some fun lines

 1.  riding the chairlift the other day with some 20 somethings---they were enjoying Aspen and thought it was awesome we lived here---then the guy asked "Is it worth it?"  My wife and I are both still chewing on that question and wondering about the answer

2.  friend who manages high end short term rentals---the Kardashians asked if they could send someone over to remove the deer poop---to which I wish she responded 'shit happens' but instead said "ok, but more deer will poop there tomorrow'

3.  my son was crossing the street at a cross walk in town (slowly pimp rollin it) and someone in a rental car got very upset with his pace.  The guy honked, rolled down his window, flipped him the bird and said " go back to where you came from"  pretty rich from the guy in the rental car to the local

4.  speaking of my son--he is going to work at the newly opened Mollie hotel.  Check out the outfits the valets wear.

Someone clearly had a thing for Jim Carrey in the Mask.

That is it for now---seems all the POW is at the Caribou Club and sadly not on the hill.

Merry X mas

its like that and thats the way it is (getting cold in our casa)

 We moved to the Aspen area about 8 years ago.  We have rented 6 homes during that time.

First house---boiler failed in a shaking smoking is it going to explode mess.  Took 3 weeks to get heat back.  Daughter's room never had heat--property manager said ' I didn't have heat in my cabin growing up what is she complaining about'

Second home--we only lived in it for 3 months---their version of 'furnished' channeled the furniture found in delta house in the movie animal house.

Third home---dear lord.  When we moved in it wasn't clean the the closets and drawers were full of their stuff, the pantry was full of their stuff (7 coffee machines) the WiFi lighting system didn't work (no lights in rooms under ground---yea we used head lamps) the heat broke and took weeks to be repaired, the roof needed to be repaired and the AV system was so screwed up that while watching Avengers End Game the audio from the TV was from little fires everywhere.  It was amusing for about 5 min and then annoying.

4th home--- not too bad.  WiFi didn't really work during COVID with kids doing class online and the property manager tried to kill one of our bunnies but aside from that we had heat (and everything else was ok)

5th home---total shit or as my bro in law said 'this house has a lot of deferred maintenance'.  Example--the front door was stuck shut for 3 weeks, the washing machines didn't work when we moved in, the master bedroom didn't have heat, the lights in one bathroom didn't work, the window hardware on casement windows was broken AND best of all the grill wasn't installed to code in exploded resulting in the gas line rupturing and spraying flames everywhere.  The house and the neighborhood almost burned to the ground.

6th home (current)  heat pump failed.  Its cold.  Heating guys said they can get to it in a week.

Is this normal?  Is construction that bad in the valley.  Are all home owners too cheap to do maintenance and get work done right?  Is it even possible to get work done right.

The view sure is nice though.

PS its not just me---the Burlingame project was supposed to have move in this week.  Now that is TBD on cert of occupancy --end result is 100s of people who don't have a place to live.

expect up to 3 hour delays

 I was driving my wife to the hospital (a colonoscopy don't freak out) just before 6AM and was greeted with that message.  Luckily this early the drive from my house to the hospital took about 12 minutes.  We were smiling about how nice Aspen can be when there are no people.  But a 3 hour delay to get into town for paving roads.  WTF.

The drive from my house to Aspen is about 10 miles.  Given that there won't be any traffic for the first 3 miles or so of that drive they are suggesting that it could take up to 3 hours to drive 7 miles.  I struggle to get my head around that.  And this is for repaving---which seems to be an annual thing.  Again WTF

Other things I struggle to get my head around:

Snowmass Village roads have been under construction for about 3 months with no end in site.  The drive from my house to the post office has gone from 2.5 miles to 4 miles.  There are sink holes appearing all over the place and it seems that all the roads are collapsing.

The woman who cuts my sons hair had her rent go from $700 a month to $6,000 a month.  That is an 850% increase.  I guess to keep her margins the same my son's hair cut would go from $75 to $650.  I struggle to figure out how much to tip on a $650 hair cut.  She no longer cuts hair.

I had to put down one of my dogs (Wiggins) recently.  The costs around it were very high.  Why?  Well when vets' rents and vets expenses in Aspen Snowmass are sky high they gotta charge sky high rates.

Everything around here costs an arm and a leg and yet we still live rural AF (as fuck).  Grocery shelves are often empty (finding lime seltzer is like winning mega millions), the emergency vets office only had a vet, no technician,  no front desk person because they can't find labor.  A friend of mine had a weird growth on his ear, took 3 weeks to get it biopsied, and 10 days later he still hasn't heard from the doc if its cancer (but heck not to worry, when the doc did the biopsy after asking him why he waiting so long to come in she said 'it looks like cancer').  Aspen and the roaring fork valley is broken.  I am not sure there is a fix.

opps I did it again (political)

 Well no I didn't do it again but my daughter and her hockey team did.

How do you win state championships wearing both home and away jerseys?  You play women's hockey in CO where there are different governing bodies giving you a chance to play not 1 but 2 state tournaments.  And in case you were wondering the boys never play more than one game in 48 hours but the women in this tournament played as many as 7 games in under 48 hours.  Way to go Aspen Skiers ---and if you were wondering how the boys Aspen skiers high school hockey team did--both the varsity and JV teams disbanded due to lack of players/interest.

But that is not what this blog is about.

Its about our congresswoman Lauren Bobert who proudly announced at a CPAC luncheon that her 17 year old son is having a baby in April making her a very proud 36 year old grandma.  To quote Lauren when making this announcement she is very proud that her son and his girlfriend are making the 'responsible decision'.  We do not know the age of the young woman carrying Lauren's grandson (yes they have done ultrasounds to determine the baby's sex and one would presume the health of the future Bobert grandson), but why do an ultrasound when the only responsible choice according to the GOP is to have the baby.  Other responsible decisions her son has made include premarital sex and not using birth control. I could provide all kinds of statistics about outcomes for both parents and children who have children while in high school but they are pretty much what your would expect.  Not good.  Interestedly children of teen mothers (Lauren, Lauren's son and Lauren's grandson) are at greater risk of becoming teen parents themselves (Lauren's mother was 18 when she had Lauren).  Children of teen parents are more likely to have health problems, not graduate from high school (again Lauren) be jailed and be unemployed.

Heck if Lauren's son and baby momma want to chose to have the child, fine.  But please don't outlaw abortion so that every other couple is forced to make the same decisions your son is making.  AND for God sake don't preach to America that you should only have sex if you are married and want to have a baby.  I mean come on just take a look around the dinner table at Thanksgiving.

When your family life resembles the title of a Brittany Spears song, I would suggest you do not preach to America about making smart decisions.  However, I do love some Brittany.

opps I did it again

a fakie

 No one hurt.  No one injured.

Well except for the mental damage (I found my daughter binging info on school shootings).  And of course missing a day of learning.  And then there are the costs for everyone scrambling around.  But aside from that no one was hurt.  Thanks goodness.

Our country looks like a case study for psych 101.  Doing something that you think makes your feel better even though it actually makes you worse off.  What am I talking about?  Guns.  More guns do not make you safer from gun violence, they make you much more likely to be hurt by gun violence.  Why won't/ can't we take all handguns and guns that use magazines out of circulation?  

If a person walks into a school, or store, or church, or roof top with a bolt action rife how many shots you think they will get off?  If they are lucky and good a handfull.  How many from an AR15 type weapon or an auto handgun?  Many magnitudes more.  Why do we allow our country to be so dangerous?  Cause some guys wrote something in the founding rule book (constitution) about guns in a well regulated militia?  They also allowed for slavery and didn't allow women or people of color to vote.  Maybe they got the idea that individuals should be allowed to posses weapons of war wrong (or maybe the current courts are interpreting the 2nd amendment wrong).

Now I gotta see if I can get my daughter back to watching something sensible and safe like Real Housewives.

daughter home safe

 her science class is just behind the police man

lots of rumor very little facts at this point.  maybe a nothing burger maybe much worse.  What I know for sure is these kids won't feel the same about school any time soon.

also how the heck do you pratice run, hide fight?  

Why the kids are so fucked up

 Im sitting in snowmass way off the beaten path listening to police sirens and fielding calls from my daughter about a school shooting.  Do I believe there is an active shooter at Aspen School District----NO. (update that seems to be wrong being told SHOTS FIRED AT ELEMENTRY SCHOOL) But even the threat of it takes the school to lock down, scrambles the Pitkin County police, Aspen Police Department, Snowmass Village Police Department and Basalt police department (update ER DOCS BEING TOLD TO REPORT TO HOSPITAL).  And the ambulances are rolling in.  We got a message about a lock down drill yesterday.  Today seems to be acting like the real deal (although as I said I am betting this is a fake threat).

Yesterday's lock down drill email stressed that they were going to practice 'locks, lights out of sight'.  They ask staff to lock the doors turn out the lights and move away from sight and be silent.  The FBI recommends Run, Hide Fight--I am a believer in the FBI approach and have told my daughter to run like hell, not be a stationary target in a room.  She has left the school and gone to a friends house near school to wait it out.  Update at friends house with ER doc told to head to hospital--friends house has a lot of guns which is good and bad ---what if school shooter comes there and cops don't know who bad guy is.

There are a ton of cops with body armor and long guns running around school.  The older kids with phones and a later start than elementary school are fleeing.  The younger kids without phones are stuck in what feels like a war zone.  Seems like maybe a gun on a school bus trigger the thing but that is pure speculation.

But here are the facts:

1.  more guns results in more gun violence not a safer place

2.  this country is using the excuse of the 2nd amendment to enable gun violence (well regulated milita anyone)

3.  There hasn't been a shooting-killing in Aspen in 40 years

4.  Aspen kids bring guns to parties

5.  No one is learning anything at the school today but their cortosile levels are dangerously high

more updates when I have them---please forgive the poor writing --working fast

you don't get that in NYC or Chicago or LA or.......

 email from school----4 elementary classes evacuated due to a release of bear spray

Girls varsity state playoffs (they won it all BTW) parent is broadcasting via an ipad ---ipad froze, it was -15 for the 8 pm game ---OUTSIDE --- in Gunnison CO

fresh snow lots of mornings showing-----a lot of wild life tracks.  Yes bunnies, and deer and elk and ......mountain lions

email from school---this bus won't be running, that bus won't be running --hope you don't actually need to depend on the busses because the school district doesn't have enough drivers

taking the dogs for a walk and finding a guy in a tree well.  I asked if he needed help and he said yea, he needed help getting out of a tree well and maybe with the new hole in his face (that doesn't happen in central park, or Runyon canyon)--dogs got a abbreviated walk and this lifty got a ride to the hospital and I got to clean the blood off the floor mats (face holes bleed a lot)

steamboat---AKA affordable housing for Aspen workers

 I was watching my daughter's team play Steamboat and hanging out with some of the 'boat parents and they used that line in response to my bitching about Aspen costs.  They are not wrong.

Speaking of which I grabbed some take out for my boy from Meat and Cheese the other night---they have doubled prices in the past 2.5 years.  Wow.  Begging customers to keep them afloat during Covid they have repaid our loyalty with eye watering prices.  I obviously haven't eaten there in years and now don't plan to.  It was one of my favorite restaurants but not its not good value anymore.  Another fav, Ale house at Aspen highlands (a bar where you order your food from the bar, they give you a number to put on your table, and someone from the kitchen drops the food in front of you) has added and 18% server tip, a 5% tip for the kitchen and I believe a 10% charge for worker housing.  So the burger that lists for $23 actually costs $30.59 (plus taxes).  Basically its a $33 burger of eh quality in a bar with no real service.  Or you can spend $23 (total) for a BLT panini at the T-Bar in Steamboat and have $10 left over to buy $4 16 oz PBR cans.  GO STEAMBOAT

signs that Aspen is broken

 1.  getting emails (day of) that a school bus isn't running ---not sure how you handle getting your kids to school when the bus doesn't run.  How often does this happen?  A couple of times a week.

2. Getting emails from the school letting you know that the cafeteria won't be open due to short staff.  How often?  A couple of times a month.

3.  Whole foods produce guy---me "you got fresh dill?"  him "haven't had it in 6 months and don't expect to get it"

4.  But wait that ain't all---we haven't had Oyster sauce in months, and many of our shelves even in basics like cereal are empty

5.  Rational locals suggesting that a train is the answer to getting people in and out of town---I asked where the train station would be in Aspen and they mentioned something like underground---yea as if

6.  Still arguing over expanding the runway---still.  like years after agreeing to do this there is still some who believe the secret to making Aspen perfect again revolves around not making the runway safer and continuing as a commercial airport.

7.  very senior ski co employees living in .....affordable housing.  If they had similar jobs at real companies they would be making $1-7M.  I don't know what they are making running large business units for Ski Co but I do know they are living in affordable housing.

8.  Kids pulling down $30-80 an hour or more (in some case much more, my son knows a server at the nell who got tipped $1k for a coffee) 

9.  crappy 1969 built apts asking $5k a square foot (no garage, 25 year old bathrooms, and $43k in HOA fees.  hey its only $5m

10.  A beautiful day of skiing yesterday with no one on the hill